Bumposaurus

Just in case you wanted a change of pace. Please enjoy. P.S. I did not write this story. Watch it here!

Princess Danielle and the Evil Wizard

Once upon a time there was a drop-dead-gorgeous princess named Danielle and she broke hearts wherever she went. She was ambitions and friendly and knew how to make any situation, no matter what it was, a good time. She made friends with pretty much everyone and didn't really care what people thought of her. She just had fun with who she was and loved everyone and lived life! But then one day an evil wizard entered Danielle's life and put a spell on her! Suddenly Princess Danielle couldn't stop taking standardized tests in PEN!! It was awful! Not only was she supposed to be done with standardized tests but you're supposed to take standardized tests with a #2 pencil! So the sneaky gremlin Emi snuck in and tripped the evil wizard and robbed him for all he was worth! She also tied his shoelaces together. But after poking and pushing on the evil wizard's nose, Gremlin Emi got the evil wizard to reverse his spell and play nice. And Princess Danielle was freed!
The End

This is what happens when I write random things on my friends' facebook walls.

Princess Kim's Korean Drama

Once upon a time, there was a planet full of flying cars. One day, however, a Korean Drama spell was put on the entire planet. All of the cars became people. And Princess Kim was now human. She found herself a prince whose name was Ching-Ching. They were very much in love.
Ching-Ching once told Princess Kim that “from the first day I met you and I looked into your deep, dark brown, doo-doo colored eyes, I knew one thing: I loved you.”
Princess Kim was flustered.
“And I will always love you forever and ever and ever.”
The next day, Ching-Ching came back and told Princess Kim that he didn’t love her anymore and didn’t think she was the one! Princess Kim was shocked and questioned what he had said the day before. He had lied, even though it had only been five minutes. Ching-Ching claimed that things change! And then he bid her goodbye forever. Princess Kim cried.
A week later, Ching-Ching returned! Princess Kim was shocked but happy! She had thought he’d said goodbye forever! But Ching-Ching had lied! He’d forgotten something that he couldn’t live without! Something that he needed in his life and couldn’t believe he’d left behind! He grabbed his slipper off the floor and nuzzled it. He promised to never leave his slipper behind again.
Then he said goodbye forever to Princess Kim again. She cried again.
(Wait, no, somebody has to die.)
“Ching-Ching!” Princess Kim cried as he was shot.
The End.

I take no credit for this story. It is my pathetically lazy Korean-Drama-esque birthday story for Princess Kim that I totally ripped off the plot, name, and even some dialogue from Nigahiga. From this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1oV_MzzNSk

Happy birthday, Kimish! <3 Maybe next time your story won’t be such a rip-off.

Princess Alpie's Favorite Story

This kinda ties in with Princess Alpie's first story which can be found here: http://emisbedtimestories.blogspot.com/2011/01/princess-alpie-and-aym.html
Please read that first and refresh your memory.



Dedication: I would like to first thank Princess Alpie for being so wonderful and always finding me funny, no matter what it is. Second, I would like to thank Princess Chiano for filming my insanity so that I could later recall the tale I told and rework it into Princess Alpie's original tale. Third, I would like to thank Princess Haylie for not only helping me to see the lovelyness of my insanity, but also for her love of "the spork story."

Foreword: "Hey diddle, the cat and the fiddle
The cow jumped over the moon
The little dog laughed to see such a sport
And the dish ran away with the spoon." - Mother Goose (not the Goose Girl, Princess Anidori-Kiladra/Isi)

-I lose cupcakes all the time
-I know they just run away. Just like the dish and the spoon, man
-Haha, spoon-man
-No, the dish ran away with the spoon
-I know, but you said spoon-man
-Well the dish was obviously very pregnant when they left. Except it was the spoon that was a girl because the spoon and the dish ran away and then the spoon had a child but it had fork’s hair. Ok. Fork and spoon. Spork is born. Spoon calls up Fork and says “he has your hair.”

Chapter 1: Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess named Alpinayniya. She was a fair and just ruler who made friends with the she-gremlin and author of her favorite tale, Ay’m. Princess Alpie’s favorite tale was a story about silverware. It was a tragic tale of love found, love lost, treachery, and heartache. This is that tale.

Chapter 2: Once upon a time, in another existence entirely, there stood a kingdom of an unusual sort. Behind the scenes lived the somewhat eccentric queen of sorts, Ay’m. Though the subjects of the kingdom didn’t quite understand that The Most High Ay’m was in control of everything and that their entire existence was a result of her every whim, their stories were written nonetheless.
One day, in the unusual sort of kingdom, there were some cupcakes. But Ay’m lost them! She was distraught at her loss, but marveled at how it paralleled the lives of one of her ladies in waiting. You see, Spoon was The Most High Ay’m’s best friend and favorite ladies maid (not Spoon-Man. Spoon-Man is both male and a superhero, two things that Spoon is not). However, one night after some sporting fiddle music and incredible acrobatic stunts performed by a cow (which were, of course, mocked by Ay’m’s Pomeranian-Poodle mix), Spoon ran away. You see, Spoon had found her true love, Dish the StableMaster, and the only way Spoon and Dish could be together was if they left. The Most High Ay’m was somewhat of a love cynic and would not have approved of the pure and true love that Spoon and Dish shared.
Spoon and Dish left for the deep forests of Syertaon. They built a small cupboard between some birch trees and made quite a cozy home for themselves. The cupboard was a big change for Spoon after sleeping in the Silverware Drawer for her whole life, but she was determined to make it work. However, they hit a bump in the road. Something had gone on in the silverware drawer, though, something that made Dish doubt everything. Spoon had a child. But it clearly had Fork’s hair and none of Dish’s features. Spoon only drove the wedge between them deeper by naming the child Spork instead of Spish or Doon.
Spoon felt that the only right thing to do was to inform Fork of their child. Dish, feeling betrayed, bid his Spoon a treasonous farewell. Spoon and Spork traveled their way back to the palace where Fork was informed of his child. He seemed to take the news better than Dish had. Dish continued to live in the forest of Syertaon, heartbroken and forgotten, while Spoon, Fork, and Spork served their roles as utensils in Ay’m’s kingdom, where The Most High Ay’m got her cynical, tragic-love ending.

Chapter 3: For some reason, Princess Alpie found this story to be fantastic and her favorite. Ay’m still doesn’t quite understand why.
Oh well.

The End.


This story was written for the lovely Princess Alpie's birthday. I promised her a story and she mentioned that a continuation of Princess Alpie and the she-gremlin Ay'm (who is me. Princess Alpie calls me a gremlin) would be acceptable. However, while refreshing my memory of the first story I wrote for Princess Alpie, I couldn't resist writing the tale of love found, love lost, treachery, and heartache.
A note to everyone? I wrote this at 3am after getting two and a half hours of sleep between 6am and 8:30am the day before. There's also a video that kinda ties in but unless you know me personally, you probably will never see it.

Happy birthday, Princess Alpie!!!!

Bedtime Story from my friend Chelsea M.

This bedtime story comes from a beautiful, blond friend of mine. She is very sweet. She wrote this in pink highlighter.

Bedtime Story <3
Once upon a time there was an adorable princess named Emi. She had always longed for a handsome prince who would kiss her. One day while she was coloring a mythical creature named Chelsea, she peered out her window and saw a handsome prince picking blueberries She opened her window, and asked what his name was. Prince James. It was love at first sight. Before they knew it, they were married and rode off in a sparkly purple carriage eating cucumbers and tomatoes.

The End.

It’s so funny how she includes a few random inside jokes, of sorts. I had a crush on a guy named James in high school. And she and another friend are sometimes called Bob and Larry after VeggieTales (Chelsea is Bob. My dad calls her ChelseaBob). Bob is a tomato and Larry is a cucumber so that’s where that comes from. :)

P.S. The two words that are in bold were actually underlined (but I don't know how to underline on BlogSpot). I don't know (or maybe I just don't remember) why she underlined those words.

Haha, Teaser

I was flipping through an old notebook from high school and found this little snippet I wrote that applied a story that I tentatively named "Morphine."


“The council lies!”
Silence fell on the room. Finally, a truth was out in the open. Jack and I turned to look at Ophelia. Her expression was unreadable. Retort building in her throat, Ophelia opened her mouth.
“But that’s unheard of. They’re the Council. They are the governors of Lethe. They govern us for a reason.”
“You think that way because you believe the lies! You’re falling right into their traps, Ophelia! Soon they’ll have you totally trapped.”
“How could they even do that?”
I looked to Jack and he nodded.
“Check behind your right ear,” I whispered.
Hesitantly her hand moved and began groping behind her ear. Her mouth opened in a gasp and I knew that she’d found the raised bumps in the hollow behind her earlobe.
“What is this,” she managed, her eyes boring into mine, unsure whether to be afraid or furious.
“Their mark,” Jack said. “We’ve all got one. They’re all slightly different though. It’s how the Council brands us and organizes us. They use a series of needles in some pattern to suck out bits and pieces of us, but also to replace bits and pieces of us. When you accept a position on the Council, you submit yourself to nineteen more needles and they rewire you completely.”
Ophelia looked shocked and her hand was still touching her mark. “Why?” Her voice was no more than a whisper.
“Because they’re looking for answers in all the wrong places. And all they end up with are lies.”
“Then what’s the truth?”

I finished reading and flipped the page, looking for the next sentence. But there isn't one. I think I need to go back to writing this story. It's a good one. ;)

Princess Cardboard

This is a very touching tale and in depth study of how we sometimes fear irrational things; things we have never even come in contact with or, for all we know, don't exist (aliens, for example).

Once upon a time there was a little girl who was deathly afraid of cardboard. Thankfully, it was long before the invention of cardboard and she had little to no idea what it was. However, that didn’t stop her from fearing it somewhere deep in her mind.
The end.